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"Where you at?", "Where you been?", "What time you coming back?", "Who you been with?" I think we've all heard these questions from our partner and if not, we've definitely asked them.
We feel it's our right to know where our man has been, what he's been doing, and with who? Can you blame us though? We are best friends, partners, and trusted confidants. So if we ask a question out of sincerity or curiosity, and not jealousy or distrust, why wouldn't he want to answer?
Well, I've had this conversation recently with a few guys who feel that their women should not ask these questions at all. They believe its a sign of distrust and a polite way of prying. They don't think we honestly want to discuss the details of their day but instead want to dig for dirt! How shameful, right?
Well, I would only ask next, why wouldn't you disclose this info? What are you hiding? And wouldn't you expect to know the same from me? Dudes say they shouldn't have to disclose all the details of their day if you trust them. They say they aren't hiding but just want to leave some parts of their life private.
And I would believe them if they can answer the last question correctly- Would you expect the same details from me? If he honestly says No, maybe we can cut him some slack. Because if he trusts you that much not to want to know who you hanging with and where, let's at least put that to the test... See how many nights you can go out without him wondering the whos and whereabouts of your outings.
Point blank, if he expects you to divulge your intimate details- he better be doing the same. Let's be fair. There are no double standards in my world.
Men and women, what do you think? Do you need to know where your partner's at all the time? And do you feel both parties are allowed privacy in a relationship? Or complete disclosure? Are the rules different for married couples?
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Permalink Reply by Shoe Lover on June 13, 2012 at 7:56pm I personally don't care what he does on his free time as long as he's a law abiding citizen and respecting me then thats his business. Once in a while I probably will ask because I care about what interests my man, but if doesnt answer my questions and talking in circles then that will be a cause of concern and he wouldnt want to know what I'm capable of doing and what i can find out!
Permalink Reply by NewMommy2012 on June 21, 2012 at 11:32am depending on how deep the relationship is, you have the right to know where your man is at. i trust my man so if he says i'm gonna go hang out or i'm going to be with this one or that one i know who his people are so i'm not worried....i also trust him so i don't care when he goes to hang out or who its with because at the end of the day i know whats going on. if you trust your man and if he trust you there shouldn't be anything to hide everything should be able to talk about any and everything. now if you not in a relationship and you asking him 21 question about where he's been then that's a problem because if you do decide to get into a relationship together he may begin to feel like you can trust him or he cant trust you because you not even trying to give him a chance. now if you are in a relationship and he or she is doing something out of the ordinary like coming in later than usual and saying you were with your friends when you really with another guy or girl then that raises a question, if you been caught cheating then you gonna really have problems.....so it goes both ways depending on the situation and what kind of relationship.
Permalink Reply by Pink Poodle on June 22, 2012 at 7:54pm I def think everyone deserves privacy but if youre living with someone, its very important to know where they are at all times. not so specific as in exact location and time down to the minute, but giving your partner an idea of where youre going and when youll be back is so important. Knowing each others friends is just a smart and safe way to go. It gives both parties a sense of trust and helps us understand and appreciate you more for the honesty. If you having trouble sharing these small details, theres definitely a big problem.
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